After Light Falls
by alatariel-gildaen
Summary: HBP Spoilers. Severus and Draco, after that event...


A/N Well, this contains HBP spoilers, so please look away if you have no desire to know them yet.

Well, as a Snape fan I simply couldn't let that ending rest now could I? So here's my version of what happens next. This is kind of my 'marriage councelling therapy' as far as Snape is concerned. I wrote this and I've forgiven him for what happened. Hope it helps you guys too

* * *

Survival instincts kicked in and he ran. Like a hunted animal he ran. Several yards ahead of him someone else was also running as if their very life depended on it. It did.

The figure ahead was slowly gaining distance away from him, but it was utterly vital that he keep up. The figure ahead, however, had the benefit of youth on his side.

He determined to keep up, and forced his limbs to move faster, despite the lack of oxygen in his lungs, and the lactic acid slowly building in his muscles.

His very surroundings seemed determined to slow him down and punish him. Many times he very nearly stumbled on the uneven earth, but the gate was in sight. "_If only that damned hippogriff hadn't been there," _he thought, as a mixture of sweat and blood from his clawed face began to drip into his eyes. Desperately he tried to wipe it away with his sleeve, but all too soon his surroundings finally defeated him; a knotted root protruding from the ground caused him to fall heavily forwards. Instantly he scrambled to his feet, and resumed his chase towards the gates. Only thirty more feet... twenty... ten... He'd made it! Now to find his companion. He looked wildly around in the near darkness. Nothing. He could see no sight of the figure he had been trying to keep up with, and the only sounds were those of his heart pounding in his ears, and his heavy, belaboured breathing.

Blind panic enclosed him in a cold shroud. It was vital that he find his companion. Else everything that had transpired that night had done so in vain. The realisation of 'everything' hit him like ice-water; for a moment he was sure his heart had stopped beating.

He dropped to his knees and clutched his head, desperate to try and squeeze the sudden vision of a frail old man falling from sight off a high balcony from his mind. His breathing was fast becoming shallow, and he became dangerously close to hyperventilating. White stars began to creep into the edge of his vision, and he vomited violently. The scream that came from him was raw and primal; it was the sound of pure grief and despair.

A hand on his shoulder startled him, and for a second he believed his failure was complete, and here was an enemy come to kill him. Instead, he looked into the face of his companion. "Hurry," said the friend.

The other man helped him back to his feet. "I'll need your help," spoke the other man.

He was still disorientated, still in danger of being sick, but this was far more important. He nodded in understanding, and the younger man took a firm grip on his arm. Summoning every last ounce of strength and concentration, the two men found themselves briefly in compressed darkness, before both fell forward to the floor.

"Where are we?" asked the younger of the two.

"Safe," the older one replied, before darkness took a hold of him, and he passed into unconscious oblivion.

* * *

He sat bolt upright with a suddenness and alertness that could only have been brought about by the use of the _enervate_ charm. He could still taste the vile, bitter taste of vomit in his mouth, and as soon as he remembered what had happened he retched again.

"Calm down. Breathe."

He looked up into the face of Draco Malfoy, amazed at the change the past year had brought about in him. Where once youthful arrogance had brought about a confidence in his eyes, now within them there was fear and distrust. He was already older than his years. Once upon a time his skin could be described as perfect alabaster, and now he had all the appearance of the walking dead.

"How long was I unconscious?" asked Severus Snape.

"Not long," replied Malfoy. "Just long enough for me to catch my breath. Where are we?"

"I told you. We are safe. That is all you need to concern yourself with right now."

"But..."

"Draco, I beg you, do not try my patience."

Still shaking, Snape, clamboured to his feet. He looked around, desperately trying to find the place he was looking for, the place Dumbledore had told him where to go when...

He shook the thought out of his head. There would be a time later for remembrance, when they were both out of the open. But it seemed that his earlier disorientation had thrown them at least three miles away from his intended destination.

"Follow me," said Snape. "And do so in silence. We have a slight journey still ahead of us."

"He set off at a brisk pace, and concentrated solely on keeping moving. In his head he repeated over and over again the mantra, "_Left, right, left, right, left, right.," _to stop himself from thinking too much.

Before long the path they were following grew steeper and more rocky. There were plenty of caves in the foothills of the Penines, but Severus was looking for a particular one. One which was protected by a spell sealed by Dumbledore's death. Severus had never been there before, and Albus had told him he would not be able to find it until after his death, and that only he, and those he invited to be with him, would ever be able to see it. He had no idea where exactly the cave would be, only that Albus had told him to follow his instincts, and that he would know it when he found it.

A ghostly, unearthly sound reached their ears. The sound was of sorrow itself, and yet it was the most beautiful sound ever heard. It was the sound of phoenix song. The cave was nearby.

He looked desperately around for the source of the song, but could find no caves in view. They were close to the edge of a cliff, and the music seemed to be louder here than on the path.

Suddenly, Severus knew what he had to do. He couldn't explain it, only that the inspiration had suddenly come to him, and somehow he knew that both he and Draco would be safe.

"Draco, do you trust me?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good, then I give you my invitation to join me." He extended his hand, which Draco, confused, took in his own. "Now run."

Before he could change his mind he ran with Draco in tow straight towards the cliff's edge. He jumped, closed his eyes, and prayed he was right.

* * *

It felt as though they had only jumped a few feet; they landed gently on cold, solid rock, even though the drop over the cliff had been well over a hundred feet.

Severus opened his eyes and looked around him. The cave was around ten feet wide by twenty feet long, with a narrow tunnel, only high enough to crawl along at one end. Against one of the walls was a set of drawers and and an antique cupboard, with shelves laden with various liqueurs that Severus frequently used as an aid for sleeping after particularly trying days. Piled into a corner were blankets, mattresses, pillows and an old teddy bear. Severus tried to force a smile. Bloody old fool had a sense of humour to the last.

He swallowed the bile threatening to rise in his throat and continued to take in his surroundings. The roof that they had seemingly dropped through was now solid. "_Obviously,"_ thought Severus, "_a similar charm to the one used on Platform 9 ¾."_ In one wall of the cave was a heavy oak door, ornately carved with an enormous brass door knob. This he opened, and was greeted with a pristine bathroom, complete with Victorian marble bath and a wide range of soaps and toiletries, as well as two toothbrushes. He slammed the door shut and screamed at the ceiling. "Why? Why you fucking bastard? I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you..." With a cry of anguish he dropped to his knees, head in hands, and began to cry. For the first time since he had been a helpless child, he genuinely cried.

Slowly, Draco approached him, unsure of how to react to the sight of one of his heroes behaving in such a manner. "Professor?" he asked.

"What?" Snape bit back.

"Professor, I don't... I don't know what to say."

"Then say nothing."

"A-are you... crying for him?" The sneer in his voice was unmistakable.

Severus remained silent. Draco meanwhile raised his wand, and shaking, pointed it straight towards Severus' face.

"Draco, I'm intrigued, what do you think you're doing?" he asked, head still in his hands.

"You... you're showing compassion... towards _him_... I..."

"Drop your wand, Draco, and allow me to explain."

"No, you have to be..."

"I said drop it!" shouted Severus, his own wand out now, and slowly, Draco lowered his own wand. "Give it to me. I want to make sure I remain uninterrupted." Grudgingly, the young man obliged. "Good." He took a deep breath, then continued. "Well, we may as well make ourselves comfortable." He waved his wand and the mattresses and blankets rearranged themselves on the floor into beds. Severus gestured towards one of them. "Please, sit down." He paused once more and tried to compose his thoughts into some semblance of order. He was unsure of where to begin, when Draco spoke.

"Why are we hiding? We will be heroes, you and I! What are we doing here?"

"Draco, that is the final time I will permit you to interrupt me. Do so again and I promise you will incur my supreme displeasure. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, sir," mumbled the young man.

"Good." He regarded Draco for a long moment before continuing. "Now, we are hiding in here because both of our lives are now endangered. Do you understand?"

"No, sir! My mission was to kill Dumbledore, and he's dead now! How could that mean we're in danger?"

"You didn't kill him. I did. You will invoke the Dark Lord's wrath for failing in your mission, and I am likely to invoke his wrath for doing it for you, that is, of course, if I am not found by a crazed member of the Order first. It was supposed to be you, and you alone, that killed him. However, you made the right choice."

"But I don't understand..."

"I am not asking you, at this time, to understand, merely to listen. Do you think that is possible?" Before Draco could answer, Severus continued. "I daresay you are wondering why I risked putting my own life on the lien as well by killing him, and from now, Draco, I am serious when I say I will not tolerate interruptions.

"You, like myself, made the greatest mistake possible by allowing ourselves to be branded with this ridiculous tattoo." He briefly indicated the Dark mark on his forearm. "It is a mistake I have been regretting for most of my adult life. However, some people are... were... willing to accept that human beings make mistakes, and to give them a second chance.

"Albus Dumbledore, as you well know, gave me sanctuary at Hogwarts, when most other people would happily have seen me locked away in Azkaban. He was a good man who did not deserve death. Equally, he was a man who knew that a sixteen year old boy should never be allowed to become a murderer.

"During the summer holidays, just after you had been given the full details of your task, I was paid an unexpected visit at home by your mother and aunt. Your mother wanted me to help you in your mission. I explained to her that it was to be your task, and that I could not help, and with that your aunt questioned my loyalty. As you know, she insisted we make an Unbreakable Vow. I had no wish to make the Vow, but neither did I have a choice. Your aunt is, shall I say, unhinged. I have no doubt that if I had not made the Vow she would have killed me there and then.

"Allow me to confirm now for you; I have always been, up to the very last moment of his life, fully loyal to Albus Dumbledore. I told him about the Vow. He knew what it would mean; there were only three options. Firstly, that you kill him. Secondly, that you fail, and I kill him. Finally, that you fail, I refuse to kill him, I die, he lives. This final option had the added effect that with the absolute failure to see Dumbledore dead, came your death as well. Albus' main priority was you. He made me promise him, in no uncertain terms, that when the time came, I would kill him. I begged him to find another solution, but the fact was, there was no other solution.

"I was devastated. But I had no choice. I promised both your mother and my mentor that I would protect you no matter what the cost. Dumbledore has a way of seeing the best in people. He would always rather die than see you become something you should never have to be.

"When... I... when the time finally came, he persuaded you to wait. He wouldn't allow you to become a killer. He was stalling time until I arrived."

"That's no true!" Draco shouted, unable to contain himself any longer. "He begged for you _not_ to kill him, I heard him."

"_Silencio!"_ roared Severus. He was shaking with anger. "Albus Dumbledore would never, ever beg for his life, you putrid little worm! He begged for me to kill him now, before you changed your mind or before someone else did, and broke the Vow! He thought you were worth saving, a life worth redeeming. I only hope you can live up to those expectations.

"I have just had to kill the only man who ever put any faith in me, for the sake of you. And if you ever, _ever_, say that he was unworthy, so help me Merlin, I'll kill you myself. Now..."

With a flick of his wand he lifted the silencing spell on Draco.

"Now, tell me, Draco, why did you join the Death Eaters?"

"Draco paused a moment before answering this. "We need to purge the wizard world of the filth that's entered it."

"That sounds to me like propaganda that you have been brainwashed with. I know, because I was just the same at your age. OK, so let us say that you succeed in purging the wizard world of 'filth.' What next?"

"Then we could live as we are meant to live."

"As in-breeds, do you mean? After a few generations everyone will be having sex with their own cousins. As an ideology it is utterly flawed.

"I've lived through all this once before; it didn't work then, and it wont work now. The only thing people like you and I can do is learn to deal with our prejudices.

"Unfortunately, or fortunately if you look at it from another angle, you cannot return to the world you wish to. I cannot return to the one I wish to. Which is why Dumbledore prepared this place for us. To stay, and to plan our next move.

"And now, I feel we need to rest, I certainly want this terrible, terrible day to end."

Severus rose up from his makeshift bed. He walked over to the cupboard, thanking once again the only man who had ever understood him for supplying him with what he needed to block the mental anguish out of his head. He reached for a bottle of fine single malt whiskey, then searched through the cupboard for a glass. Dumbledore had them filled with food and drink; certainly enough to last for over a week. It seemed he not put any plates, glasses, or cutlery into the cupboards as well as this, though.

He began searching through the drawers, amazed that someone who preplanned everything to the last detail as Dumbledore did would forget to provide glasses. However, in one of the drawers he found something else he hadn't been expecting. Several letters, one of which was addressed to him. He picked this up and began to read.

_My dear Severus,_

_Unfortunately, once you read this I am already dead. I only pray that it was you, and not Draco who performed the deed. Look after him, Severus, he is the future. Only through the re-education of minds such as his can the future of our kind be secured._

_You may well be wondering what to do next. You are probably feeling hopelessly lost, and unable to go anywhere, wishing I would stop my rambling so that you could get stuck into that fine single malt I daresay you are currently holding. Don't worry, my boy, I hope that the other letters here may help. There is one to every member of the Order, and one to Harry. I have explained everything to them, and request that they meet with you secretly, in order that you may prove where your loyalties truly lie. I ask them not to blame , but to show you the support and understanding you deserve in such a trying situation._

_And finally, Severus, I ask you not to blame yourself as well. Please do not allow self loathing and hatred to take over you and cloud your judgment. You are worth much, much more than that. You must forgive yourself. I have already forgiven you._

_Ever your friend,_

_Albus Dumbledore._

_P.S. The exit is through the tunnel, but I would not recommend you try and re-enter that way, unless you wish to spend the rest of your life believing yourself to be a mountain goat._

Carefully, Severus folded the now heavily tear stained letter. He raised it to his lips and whispered, "Thank you." Turning back to Draco, he raised the bottle in memory of his true friend, and was ready to face his uncertain future.


End file.
